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By pix Submitted by pixiedevil24 Date: 2001 Jul 21 Comment on this Work [[2001.07.21.21.10.23502]] |
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dear scott, so, are you ok? Is something wrong? Because you seemd a little out of it with me today. You flaked out on me a few times. and you know how i feel about that, you know how rude i think it is when people break plans because they found something better to do instead of keeping plans they've already made. So, what's up? What's wrong? Why did you make it so hard for us to hang out today? Are you avoiding me on purpose or is it just some kind of habit that you're picking up from ben? I needed to talk to you today. I wanted to know what you were doing for a week and a half when you were gone, but you didn't want to talk about that i guess. And you didn't even mention candace and you having a fight. You just played that stupid tape baseball game with ben and let us sit out in the hot sun and watch you guys be idiots. I wanted to ask you what you ment by bringing up the idea of ben and i again that night. And also i needed to tell you about matt and darin. And rachel. I wanted to tell you how weird it felt to not hang out with you or talk to you for a week when i'm used to seeing you almost everyday. How i missed you and how strange and hard it's going to be when we both go back to colleg and won't see eachother for months. And how, i don't know, how i'm glad we can hang out still, dispit everything. But, you didn't have time, so that sucks. so i'm disapointed. I know that you are a guy and stuff like this wouldn't fase you, but i'm a girl, and i take things personal and i take this, the way you brushed me off today, personal and i'm offended. and confused. It just makes me angry when i put so mush effort into my friendships with people. I always return calls, and if i can't do something one night with a friend, i try and make plans for another time to show that i still want to hang out with them. I don't flake out, i don't screw people over and lie. I don't ignore them when they try to hang out with me after i haven't seen them for a while. I keep in touch and i expect them to put a little effort into the friendship too. It's not too mush to ask. God scott, i consider you one of my closest friends. I know i can talk to you about anything and you'll listen and understand. And you know that i would do anything for you, and i listen and offer advice when you feel you need it. I'm always there for you, no matter what, no matter how uncomfortable and akward your friends make me feel, it doesn't matter, because i'm just there for you anyways. I don't judge you and your choice of girls or weekend activities. I stand up for you when a lot of my friends think you are too messed up. And i missed you. so, ya, i'm being dramatic, but this is how i honestly feel. I'm disapointed in you today, because i know you are better than that. i know you are because when i have needed you the most, you've been there, like prom, and so many times with ben. I need you around. It's going to suck when i can't see you whenever i want to because you'll be in florida and i'll be in northern california. kinda where rachel thinks you go to college right? so, what can i do? i can't possible try harder, so do i just forget it and just let what happens happen? Well, that's not how i am, but i need you to care some too, please. i'm worth it. -pix |